I Gotta Dance More!

I Gotta Dance More!


As a previously depressed college student/manic corporate go-getter, I’ve been back and forth between overweight and unhealthily-obsessed-with-bodily-perfection for all of my adult life. At my heaviest I weighed in at 148 pounds (at 5’0″), and at my lightest I was close to dipping down into the double digits. I’m a veteran of the weight loss game, but on 1,200 calories a day I don’t just get skinnyI get vicious. I’ve just recently started to accept that 125 pounds is my “happy weight”, but some days I still struggle with the fact that my stomach has never been (and probably never will be) as flat as a table. I do my best every day to love myself no matter what size/shape I am, so long as I can still do the things that I love.

In short: my New Year’s resolutions don’t include miracle diets, fasting, or spring cleanses. In fact, for dinner last night I had a cinnamon roll, a protein shake, and a bowl of Doritosand I’ll be damned if I’m going to apologize for it.


The paradigm shift I’ve been nurturing over the past year has been gradually leading me to a healthier outlook towards my own bodyan outlook that values what my body can do instead of what my body looks like. It’s been a relief to be able to shower without poking at my belly, wondering whether or not I’ve gained or lost flab over the past week. On top of that, the prioritization of strength over aesthetics isn’t just better for my mental health, it’s better for my riding, too!

I don’t tend to be very forthcoming about my exercise routine. Part of that is because my weight and my fluctuating self-image can be a bit of a sore topic, but the other part is that, other than long bike rides during the summer, the way I exercise isn’t as traditional as the jog/lift/swim trifecta that most people adhere to. My sport isn’t a clean, innocent sportsometimes it can bring up some awkward assumptions, even though it’s honestly just a fun way to get lady swole.

I started pole dancing around a year and a half ago, but I’ve always wanted to be able to dance. When I was a preteen I’d spend hours in my room with my headphones on, spinning wildly in circles and choreographing complicated (probably physically impossible) routines in my head. So when my friend Merri (of Missy and Merri fame) threw her bachelorette party in a pole dancing studio a couple of summers ago, it wasn’t surprising that I ended up taking weekly lessons with my friends. Now I’ve got a pole to practice on in my basement, where I can look as silly as possible without anyone watching!

Anyways, I just thought I’d share a bit about how I plan on using pole to physically take my riding to a new level this year! Hope I didn’t bore anyone with the exercise talk, blergh. :S

He’ll only be impressed when I lug myself around the arena for hours at a time, lol.
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